I know my depression has been triggered by the events this past weekend, so take what I saw with a grain of salt. The LGBTQA family members and the death of Christina Grimmie has left me feeling very hopeless.
What’s worse, is being around people who aren’t LGBTQA becuase they don’t mourn the same, at least from what I’ve seen. They don’t understand the hurt, the direct threat that becomes a reality for so many of us.
I’ve become spoiled living in Seattle. I forget what it’s like to walk down the street with your girlfriend and NOT show affection, out of fear. I’m grateful that I get to live in a city that isn’t threatened by my queerness.
I can only hope that others can move to a place where they will be loved and accepted. I’m sorry for loss that many of us have felt and directly experienced.
My brain is telling me to kill myself, but I won’t. Not today. Today, I’ll cry and mourn and continue living my very gay life. I’m grateful to so many, but especially to those LGBTQA advocates who risk their lives everyday to spread awareness and who fight for the rights of people like me. Thank you.
<3 Brittany Simon